My last post was dated 3 December 2021. It’s been quite a minute since I posted. Although it might seem like I forgot I have this blog, I did not. It was always on my mind and the fact that I was posting inconsistently was messing with me. However, I just couldn’t bring myself to write something that was post-worthy.
Now, what do I mean by that? It’s not that I didn’t write anything at all. It’s just that what I wrote didn’t really appeal to me anymore. It’s like the Sameeta who wrote all those drafts isn’t 100% me. I forced myself to write, kinda like a chore. Now, there’s nothing wrong with forcing yourself. Sometimes you’ve gotta be hard on yourself or give yourself that extra push. But when you do give that push, you expect that you’d eventually get into it. Fake it till you make it attitude, you know? But I wasn’t feeling that at all. I was faking it but clearly not making it. I realised I had ideas but no inspiration. And I don’t like to read things I’ve written and realise I don’t like it at all. That’s demotivating. So I decided to stop. I felt it was best. Even if I did continue to post, I feel like I would’ve deleted them eventually.
It’s not like I did nothing these couple of days. I had my exams to prepare for and I even went on vacation!! I hadn’t been to India since 2019, so it was nice to go back. I thought I would want to spend a lot more time in India, considering the fact that I didn’t leave home for almost 2 and a half years. However, I did get homesick quite often and wanted to get back home soon. I think I got so used to being stuck at home that it became my normal. Going on vacation was something new, a change. I’ve written a blog post about change, you should read that (shameless plug😂). Anyways, my vacation was probably the most eventful days I’ve experienced in the last three years. I had a really good time. I spent most of my time at my relatives or friends house, didn’t really go out much, but that was really nice too. Speaking of the exams, they went well, so all in all, 2021 ended on a good note.
It’s a really nice feeling to be in the right mood and mind space to write. It’s so much easier and way more fun. Words just flow out and there’s no hesitation or doubt. I’m going to try to be more consistent now. Let’s see how that goes.
I hope you liked reading through this tiny monologue, if that’s what I can call it, and hopefully, you related to it on some level. Thank you for being here and I hope you have a great 2022!! Bye 👋
